


Ginger Spice

by devastating



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, And Dimitri can’t flirt for shit, Attempt at Humor, Background Relationships, Eventual Fluff, Glenn Fraldarius Lives, Implied/Referenced Character Death, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Soft Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd, Soft Sylvain Jose Gautier, Sylvain Jose Gautier Being An Idiot, Sylvain Jose Gautier’s Bad Self Esteem, Sylvain’s in ballet despite me never being in ballet and it’s obvious, They’re both just stupid boys in love, but mainly Sylvain is stupid, some tiny angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-18
Packaged: 2021-03-08 17:55:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 17,101
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27480811
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/devastating/pseuds/devastating
Summary: “Well I mean, if it comes down to it guess you and I can just make a promise.”“Promise?” Dimitri frowned.“Yeah. If by that time you’re still not dating anyone and I’m still not serious with anyone, then we can just get married. Make me into Sylvain Blaiddyd” Sylvain winked and instantly the blonde turned a deep shade of red.8 years ago Sylvain told Dimitri that they should get married, not once did he expect the blonde to actually keep that promiseAlternate title: Oh Shit We Forgot Felix!
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd & Dedue Molinaro, Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Sylvain Jose Gautier, Felix Hugo Fraldarius & Sylvain Jose Gautier
Comments: 4
Kudos: 43





	1. Explaining Your Joke Is Sometimes Essential

**Author's Note:**

> Weeks ago I saw a tweet that said something along the lines of: “Sylvain jokingly tells Dimitri to marry him completely unaware of the blonde pining for him and waiting for this exact moment to come” and it has fucken left my stupid brain since so please enjoy my take on that tweet

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dimivain really grabbed me by the scruff and said, “you live here now” huh?
> 
> Anyways! I’ll try to update this quickly because I have both the time and desire to have this all up before December since i have other things planned for that month (◕‿◕✿)

* * *

**3rd of the Red Wolf Moon, 8 Years ago**

* * *

“Look, Dimitri, all I am saying that at this rate, you’re never going to get yourself a wife” Sylvain sighed at the blonde in front of him. 

Dimitri frowned, “I hardly think now is the time to be looking for a _wife_.” 

“I mean I’m not saying to go look for her _now_ and hey, maybe you don’t even want to marry, power to you if that’s the case, but all I am saying is that with your uh…. experience, I don’t think you’ll be able to woo anyone...ever” Sylvain cringes. He loves Dimitri. Truly and wholeheartedly, he loves the blonde. But he’s also fully aware that in the 10 years that he’s known the younger boy, Dimitri’s flirting is piss poor at best. 

“I don’t see how me finding someone to date even matters” Dimitri sighed, shifting his backpack and continuing their walk to their homes. “Honestly marriage sounds great but I also very much don’t care about romance at the moment.” 

“Which is extremely sad. Haven’t you heard that all you need is love?” Sylvian grinned, batting his eyelashes at the blonde in a way that he knew always made the younger boy splutter which was truly adorable if he was honest. 

“Sylvain we’re in highschool, it’s too soon to talk about love” Dimitri mumbled. 

The redhead hummed, “yes I guess you’re right, but I think once we’re older you’ll be thanking me for all of these flirting lessons I’ve been giving you.” 

“You’ve hardly given me any lessons.” 

“So many lessons” Sylvain ignored the blonde as they stopped at the corner of the street, Dimitri’s house was only three houses down while Sylvain’s was two blocks away in the opposite direction, this was where they usually split off which meant that this was always where he made sure to leave the blonde with something to remember. “Look all I’m saying is what are you going to do when you’re 23 and completely fucken single?” 

“Well what are you going to do when you’re 25 and still unable to stop ‘falling in love’ with everyone you meet” Dimitri huffed, crossing his arms over his chest. 

“Touché” Sylvain mumbled before grinning. “Well I mean, if it comes down to it guess you and I can just make a promise.” 

“Promise?” Dimitri frowned. 

“Yeah. If by that time you’re still not dating anyone and I’m still not serious with anyone, then we can just get married. Make me into Sylvain Blaiddyd” Sylvain winked and instantly the blonde turned a deep shade of red. That alone caused him to bark out a laugh, mentally patting himself on the back for being able to get Dimitri flustered before they had to leave. 

“You’re so cute Mitya,” Sylvain chuckled, ruffling the younger boy's hair before turning away. “See you tomorrow!” 

Dimitri spluttered for a couple of seconds more before yelling out to him. “See you tomorrow!! Text me when you get home!” 

Sylvain gave him a thumbs up before walking away. The promise he had made before already starting to faze out of his memory since to him, it had just been a joke.

* * *

**3rd of the Red Wolf Moon, Present**

* * *

“One, two— no no again!” 

Sylvain groaned as their director forced them all to restart for the tenth time that day. He loved Manuela, he truly did, and he even admired the woman. He grew up watching her ballet performances and she had been the one ballerina that had made him try to pursue ballet professionally in the first place. But, goddess above, was she the most frustrating director to walk the planet. She was a perfectionist, and even though this was just simple warmups, she expected them to be at their best already. 

“How many times must I repeat myself?!” Manuela practically screeched. “One two three, _turn_. It is not that difficult” she huffed before pacing around the room critiquing everyone individually. 

“Seems like someone hasn’t had their morning dick” Dorothea whispered to him, making him sputter and laugh. 

At 16 he had stopped dancing completely at his parents' request and it hadn’t been until he met Dorothea in college that he decided to pick it up again. He had been hesitant of course but after one drunk night where he admitted to the brunette that he missed dancing more than anything in his life, she practically dragged him to her practices from there on out. It had been hard of course, going 3 years without dancing had basically reverted him to beginner level but through it all she stayed by his side until he was good enough to join her troupe. And yes, his decision to drop out of business school and pursue dance had gotten him disowned, and YES, ballet sometimes left him with bruises and injuries for days, but he was happy. He was so fucken happy and he wouldn’t trade this for the world.

“Sylvain, can you come here real quick,” Manuale sighed. He gave Dorothea a knowing look before walking over. “Can you please help Johnathon with lifts?” 

‘I always help everyone with lifts’, is what he wants to say but instead he just smiles and nods. A pro to being a guy in ballet was that the competitiveness for the ‘lead role’ was not so soul crushing as it was for girls (that didn’t mean it wasn’t competitive for guys it just wasn’t _that_ bad). Of course the down side for guys was that you better be strong enough to lift all of the girls here and even some guys if you want to make it. Most guys that came didn’t know that, expecting to be able to be prima donnas and not bother with weight lifting like other dance majors but well. Ballet, if anything, required the most lifts that Sylvain knew of. Johnathon, the poor guy, had weak arm strength and couldn’t even pick up their smallest girl (which was concerning since he kept saying he’d been dancing for years) and so most of the practice revolved around him telling the guy to just go to the gym. 

“Sylvie” Dorothea cooed the minute he got out of the changing rooms. The brunette waiting for him outside the room with a smirk on her face. 

“Thea” he cooed back, earning a chuckle from her. 

“Two things” she said as the two started walking down the hallway. “One, are you free this week? I need to start practicing for the lead part. I know I know, auditions aren’t until three weeks from now but there’s a lift in one of the scenes that I am a hundred percent sure that Manuela will have us perform during tryouts.” 

He sighed, “yeah no joke. She’s been having me fucken teach every new guy how to do lifts for the past two weeks.” 

“It’s funny how you became her little pet” Dorothea giggled. 

“Haha so funny” he chuckled, rolling his eyes. “But yeah I’m free, I’ll help you out. I promised to hang out with Felix later this week though so I’ll text you when he decides on what day he wants to hang out.” 

“How is Felix by the way?” 

“Good but anyways what’s the second thing” he asked. 

“The second thing is that Ingrid asked me to tell you to meet her at the park near the pond, she says you know the one” Dorothea explained as she grabbed her phone to reply to a text. “She says she has a surprise for you.” 

“Ooh a surprise? For little ol me?” He asked. “Did she tell you what it was?” 

“Nope” she grinned which meant that she had but was choosing to side with Ingrid this time around instead of him. 

He sighed, “fine! Keep me in the dark you minx. When I show up on the news as the newest murder case know that it was because you didn’t warn me about what I was walking into.” 

Dorothea barked out a laugh, “you’re so dramatic. Trust me. This will be great, you’ll love it.” 

“I highly doubt that” he mumbled before checking his phone. “Did she want me to go now?” 

“I assume so.” 

He sighed, “well I don’t have time to change so they better not hope to take any pictures or anything.” 

It wasn’t that he looked bad but he had just come out of practice, his hair was still wet from his shower, he was wearing worn down joggers, a loose fitted old tank top, and he wasn’t even wearing his contacts anymore. He still looked okay enough to go out but that was just thanks to his genetics and not because he looked like his proper usual self. Still. He knew what it meant to be late when it came to Ingrid planning anything and he quite liked being able to keep his limbs so he will take a shitty appearance over making the blonde wait for even a second longer. 

“Well I’ll see you around” he kissed the girl on the cheek, before walking out towards his car . 

The “park near the pond” was just a random park that Sylvain had taken them all to because he had seen a swan in it one time and ever since then, everyone deemed that to be the place to hang out if they wanted to be outdoors. It wasn’t breathtaking and it certainly wasn’t the biggest park in Garreg Mach, but it did have the occasional duck and way too many geese for it to be considered safe for children which was why they always frequented the place. And yes, they had all been attacked by the geese at least two times now, but hey, the ducks were nice sometimes so for that reason alone they still kept going there. 

He parked at the same place he always did and walked to the place they usually hung out in, a picnic table that was right under the tree the furthest to the right where the pond shore was a little too close for comfort but far enough that no one had fallen in yet. He was, admittedly, a little annoyed that he was the only one there so far because now that he was here, he noticed that his hair was starting to curl in the way he hated. If he had known that he wasn’t running late then he would have, simply put, taken his goddamn time to get here. 

“Sylvain?” 

He turned and immediately beamed, “Mitya!! You’re here!!” He stood up to hug the blonde man. “I was getting worried that all of you left me behind to go eat or something. Fucken weird for me to be the one that gets here first.” 

Dimitri chuckled nervously, “y-yeah. I think they’re all on their way.” 

He sighed, “I wish they had told me I had time, Ingrid made it sound like I was running late by texting Dorothea instead of texting me directly. I would have gone back to my apartment and make myself presentable.” 

“You look nice” Dimitri quickly stammered out. “You always look nice.” 

“Aw thanks Mitya” he smiled. “Keep complimenting me and I might just _swoon_.” He winked.

Dimitri chuckled nervously again, and now Sylvain couldn’t help but frown. He flirted with Dimitri a lot… _a lot_. But he had since they were teenagers and it had, at first, started so that the man didn’t immediately have a heart attack whenever anyone paid him any kind of compliment but over time it just became a force of habit. And yes, one might say that sometimes he was a little bit overly flirty with Dimitri (cough Felix cough). And yes he had on multiple occasions sat on Dimitri’s lap as a haha funny joke because blushing Dimitri had always been adorable to him. And YES, he only really flirted with Dimitri out of all of his friends to the point that no one even batted an eye at him calling Dimitri various pet names. But again, he had been doing it for years so he was fairly sure that his flirting antics weren't the reason for the blonde's current discomfort which could only mean that something had happened and Dimitri was putting up a mask to hide that something. 

“What’s wrong?” 

Dimitri blinked at him, “what?” 

“What’s wrong you’re acting weird” he cocked his head to the side. “If something happened you can tell me, you know I’m always here for you Mitya.” 

“Huh? Oh no. No no, there is nothing wrong I promise. I’m just tired, you see, Glenn came to visit me and so I was up all night with him” Dimitri explained as he sat down. 

“Aaaah so Glenn kept you up huh? Not surprised you two have gotten pretty close” he smirked. 

“It’s not like that” Dimitri quickly spoke and Sylvain couldn’t help but laugh. 

“Aaaaw does my Mitya have a crush” he cooed, getting up to wrap his arm around the man's shoulders, pushing his chest onto the man's back. “Ooooh! My little lion, finally getting some romance in his life!” 

“It’s really not like that.” 

“It’s fine your secret’s safe with me” he winked at the blonde before hooking his chin over Dimitri’s shoulder and sighing. “I will say though that you dating Glenn will probably cause some problems in the friend group but not to worry sweetheart! I will help you with managing everything” he laughed, pulling away. “No but seriously, I’ll help you at least with breaking the news to Felix because we both know he’ll throw a tantrum about this.” 

Dimitri groaned, “Sylvain.” 

“Okay okay okay,” he waved the man off, already thinking about ways to figure out if Glenn was interested. On one hand, Fraldarius’ sucked at anything romantic, but on the other hand, Glenn _had_ come down here all the way from Fhirdiad just to hang out with Dimitri so there was a high chance that Glenn already did like Dimitri. 

“Sylvain.” 

He turned to look at the blonde and found the man a lot closer than he had been before and for a split second Dimitri’s eyes flickered down to his lips. His breath hitched at the sight of the blonde slowly closing the distance between them. And for a split second everything stopped and Sylvain believed wholeheartedly that he was about to be kissed by Dimitri but then bright blue hair quickly got closer and closer. Like a string suddenly snapping, his brain rebooted and he quickly looked to the side and smiled at Caspar, mentally chastising himself for ever thinking that Dimitri _wanted_ to kiss him. 

“Caspar! My man!” He laughed out as he stood up to hug the man. “What are you doing here?” 

“Oh Lin and I were over by the swings when I saw you sitting over here and just thought I’d come say hello” Caspar laughed before looking behind him. “Hi Dimitri!” 

“Hello Caspar” Dimitri sighed. 

“You know I had no idea that you guys hung out in this park” Caspar mused, looking around them. 

“Came here ‘cause I saw a swan one time and no one believed me” Sylvain shrugged. “Been coming ever since.” 

“A swan?!” 

Sylvain laughed at the younger mans reaction before retelling the whole story to Caspar. The entire time the younger man seemed absolutely psyched at the idea that maybe, just maybe, a swan would show up in the pond one day. It was fun, sometimes the people around Sylvain weren’t that excited to hear his stories or were used to his theatrics enough for it to no longer have an affect on them but Caspar wasn’t which was why he ended up getting _really_ into telling him the story of the swan and then telling him other stories and by the time that he had Caspar wheezing on the floor from laughing so hard, he realized that the rest of the group had finally arrived though he felt like he was missing something because almost all of them (minus Felix who was still missing) looked pissed off. Like _really_ pissed off. 

“Holy shit Sylvain you’re so funny” Caspar wheezed out. 

He preened at the comment because if there was one thing he was, it was prideful. “why thank you Caspar, it’s nice to be appreciated here and there.” 

“Well I should probably check on Linhardt to make sure he didn’t die or anything but we have to hang out again” Caspar smiled at him. “Seriously.” 

“Hey man, I’m free every weekend” he shrugged. 

Caspar immediately beamed at that, “great! I’ll get your number from Dorothea then! I’ll see you around okay?” 

“Bye bye” he waved the man goodbye before chuckling and shaking his head. “Guy knows how to make you feel like you’re the world’s best comedian or something.” 

“I didn’t know you were so close to Caspar” Annette tried to come off casual but Sylvain could see the way her smile tensed around the edges which unnerved him to say the least.

“Uuh well I mean not really. I know him ‘cause of Thea” he spoke hesitantly, eyeing everyone questioningly before realization hit him and he sighed. “I swear to all of you I was not trying to get into Caspar’s pants so before you all maul me for not giving you all my undivided attention because I was ‘flirting’ with someone. _Know_ that I was just being _friendly_.” 

“You’re unbelievable,” Ingrid groaned.

“I was!! Ask Mitya! He was there when Caspar came!” He turned to Dimitri then. “Come on, tell them that I was just being nice.” 

“He was” Dimitri answered though it sounded to him like he was pulling his teeth out by saying that. 

He sighed, part annoyed and part frustrated. He wasn’t in the mood to be scolded and quite frankly, would rather be home than to deal with that. “Damned if I’m friendly. Damned if I’m not” he mumbled rubbing his face with his hand before standing up. “Look I’m tired, I just got out of practice and I’m not in the mood to be yelled at about wanting to fuck someone when I was just being friendly.” 

Dimitri quickly straightened up, “Wait Sylvain—“ 

“It’s fine Dimitri” he cut him off, “I’ll see you all later” he waved them goodbye before walking away. 

He thought that he had made it obvious to everyone that he had moved on from just mindless fucking, that he was trying to change but he can see now that he hadn’t made it obvious. That alone caused him to groan as he got into his car. He was trying for fucks sake, he was really really trying and hadn’t even gone on a date in months! And he didn’t even find Caspar attractive! Yeah the man wasn’t ugly and he was sure some people would be into him, but he wasn’t one of those people. He had just been talking, that was all he had been doing and for that to be thrown at his face. Well. He would be lying if he said it didn’t leave him feeling like shit. 

The feeling didn’t magically go away once he got to his apartment either, it didn’t even go away when his dog, Whiskey, scampered over to say hello. He smiled at the little weenie dog, cooed at him and pampered him with kisses but he still, very much, felt like shit. Which was why he didn’t even bother with cooking, grabbing the goddess forsaken frozen corn dogs from his freezer and throwing them into his microwave. 

He never did figure out what surprise Ingrid had for him. 

That made him groan as he pulled out his phone, might as well call Dorothea and ask her what “surprise” he was supposed to get before he left. However, four messages were already there waiting for him. Two from Dimitri, one from Ingrid, and one from Glenn. 

Glenn? 

He doesn’t hesitate to unlock his phone to see what the older man texted him. 

**Glenn (7:45 pm):**  
_call me_

Wow. All that build up for just two words, he thinks. Sylvain should have seen that coming, if 12 years of being Felix’s friends had taught him anything it was that Fraldarius’ sucked at communicating so of course Felix’s older brother would be the type to just say call me without explaining why or anything else. 

Because he was feeling petty he left the other man on read as he checked the other messages. 

**Ingie (7:38 pm):**  
_Hey I’m sorry I didn’t mean to make it sound like I was chastising you for talking to Caspar. I know you were just trying to be friendly, my groan was for something else I promise. Call me when you can, okay?_

Because he sucks at dealing with problems like a proper adult, he leaves her on read too. 

**Little Lion ♡ (7:25 pm):**  
_Sylvain I am sorry if I did something to upset you or to offend you, I promise that is not what I had meant to do today_

**Little Lion ♡ (7:39 pm):**  
_Please let me buy you coffee as an apology. I really did not mean to ever make you upset_

Because the blonde practically has him on a leash, Sylvain answers.

_you really don’t have to buy me coffee, I’m good._

He immediately sees that the other man read his message and starts to type back his response but the beeping of his microwave pulls him away for now. He should be annoyed at Dimitri for not backing him up, maybe give him the same treatment as Ingrid but there’s very little Sylvain won’t do for the blonde. Whether Dimitri knows this or not, he has complete control over him. The man could walk up to Sylvain and tell him to get on his knees and he would gladly do that and more.

It wasn’t because he had a crush on the man though, he sternly tells himself this, as he plops the corn dogs on a plate; squirting an unnecessary amount of ketchup on the side and then walking over to his living room. He doesn’t have a crush on Dimitri, he’s just a friend. A very very close friend and that’s it. Sylvain shook those thoughts from his head, no use thinking like that anyways. He sighed, quietly eating his sad dinner before finally checking his phone for Dimitri’s reply.

 **Little Lion ♡ (7:45 pm):**  
_No please, let me make it up to you._  
_Sylvain I truly did not mean for you to get upset today. I had been hoping to only make you happy and I am truly sorry that I couldn’t do that for you_

_Mitya_

_it’s not your job to make me happy_

_don’t get me wrong you make me happy, but it’s literally not your job to do that_

_Even still please let me make it up to you._

_you’re not going to let this go are you_

_please imagine me giving you my best puppy dog eyes right now_

_I would very much like to still make it up to you._

_you’re killing me Mitya_

_but I guess it can't be helped_

_we can go get coffee later_

_:)_

_dork_

He didn’t end up calling Glenn at all that night and he also forgot to text Ingrid back until the next morning. It wasn’t done on purpose he just got side tracked by watching random cooking videos. That and contrary to popular belief he sucked at texting people. He was on his phone all the time, that was true, but that didn’t mean he was texting. The amount of times he saw a message pop up and he told himself ‘Ah I’ll answer that after this video’ and then didn’t answer it at all, would amaze anyone.

There were only two people that got quick replies from him. Dimitri and Felix. Everyone else was shit out of luck. They would have a better chance at telling Dimitri (because Felix sucked too) to tell him something than text him themselves and wait for him to reply. That was why Ingrid always told Dorothea whenever he was needed after practice because if not, he wouldn’t see the messages until he was home and comfortably changed into his pajamas. 

Sylvain woke up to one of the two people texting him. 

**Fefe the cat (10:12 am):**  
_Hey. You busy?_

_Depends_

_the fuck does that even mean_

_Im not going running with you_

_i don't want to go running with you_  
 _I’m asking cuz i need to ask you something_  
 _or more like I’m being told to ask you something_

_personally I love that Annette gets you to be here little messenger_

_its what she deserves_

_go die_

_anyways im free today_

_meet me at the shitty diner you like_

_rude, you love the steak there_

One shower, a shitty traffic jam reroute, and 30 minutes later, Sylvain finds himself sitting in the old “shitty” diner waiting for Felix. It was personally, Sylvain’s little safe haven, the one restaurant that was close to campus that stayed open 24/7 and didn’t ask too many questions when someone walked in without shoes. Sylvain used to be a regular, practically stopping by this place every time he was out with one of his flings or just completely drunk. The owners knew him enough to know Felix’s number so that he could be “picked up” and that was the main reason why Felix even knew of this place. In the 5 years of him living in Garreg Mach, he had yet to bring anyone but Felix here and as he took a bite of his cheeseburger, he started wondering why because he was sure at least Ingrid and Dimitri would _love_ this place.

“Why do you look like a fucken mess?” 

He looked up to find raven hair and angry eyes, so naturally he found himself smiling. “If you keep complimenting me like that I think I might fall in love with you.” He swooned and before the younger man could maul him, he nudged the steak dinner he had ordered the man. 

“You didn’t answer my question” Felix rolled his eyes as he sat down and immediately dug into the steak. 

“Yes well insomnia is something I do have.”

“Nightmares?” 

“Yeah feel like the past three months they’ve been shittier than usual” he sighed dramatically. “If only there was someone there to keep a young lad like me company throughout the night.”

Felix rolled his eyes, “suck it up and sleep alone pussy.” 

Sylvain sighed, amping up the theatrics, “oh woe is me, a lover doomed to die alone!! OoooOOOooo! Poor Sylvain!!! A man who—“ he doesn’t get to finish the rest of his monologue as Felix quickly starts throwing things at him to get him to shut up. Sylvain can only giggle before resting his chin on his hand and smiling at the younger man, “Anyways why’d you want to hang out with me?” 

“Who said I wanted to hang out with you” Felix, who drove here to do just that, says. 

“Oh so you’re here to use me and then leave me high and dry? OOOOH POOR ME, A LOVER—“ he immediately gets more things thrown at him. 

“Fuck you’re annoying” Felix mumbled though he smiled at the redhead. 

“And yet I am your best friend if I recall correctly,” Sylvains grin grew at the sight of the blush on Felix’s cheeks. 

“Shut up fucker” Felix mumbled before looking like he wanted to say something. 

“Anyways what’s up? What mission has your little girlfriend given you?” 

“Not a mission from her” Felix frowned before sighing, “It’s from Glenn.” 

“Glenn? He came down to visit right?” 

“A surprise visit he says” Felix sighed. “I have no idea why he came over” the younger man groaned, rubbing his face with his hand. “Though I’m taking a wild guess and saying that it probably has to deal with you hence why we’re here.”

“Ah fuck me?” He asked hesitantly. “It’s never a good thing when Glenn talks about me. Last time he did he told you to stuff my ass into a suitcase and ship me off to Brigid.” 

“This isn’t a good mission either if we’re being particular.” 

“FELIX.” 

“Look just,” Felix sighed. “Are you single right now?” 

He blinked at the man, taken back by the question before narrowing his eyes. “Why is your brother asking if I’m single…” 

“Ew gross no he’s not trying to hit on you” Felix kicked his shin for even thinking that before shaking his head. “No he just asked me and wouldn’t tell me why. Honestly when I told him I had no idea he seemed annoyed with that until Ingrid suggested that I ask you directly.” 

“Wait Ingrid?” 

“Yeah.” 

He frowned, “why the fuck does Ingrid want to know if I’m single?” 

“Fuck if I know, like I said. They didn’t tell me why and I couldn’t be bothered to ask” Felix huffed, pulling out his phone to most likely text Glenn. “Anyways are you?” 

“Um well, yeah” he answered hesitantly before chuckling, “I don’t see why that matters though.” 

The younger man just shrugged, sending a quick text to his brother before putting his phone away. “Fuck if I know. I did tell them that you haven’t been hooking up with random people anymore so I think maybe they thought you were finally settling down with someone.” 

That causes him to bark out a laugh, “me? Settling down? Please, as if anyone would want that” he chuckled again despite Felix’s frown. “Oh come on. Even you know my emotional baggage is too much for any sane person to want to deal with. I’m hot but not that hot.” 

“How many times do I have to tell you you’re not worthless for you to get it through that thick skull of yours?” Felix glared despite the words he had just said. They had practically been the closest thing to affection that Sylvain would ever get if they were being real for a second. 

“You are welcome to tell me as many times as you want if it means I get to get a compliment from you Fefe” he grinned and immediately, Felix started throwing things at him again, making the redhead laugh.


	2. Nicknames Can And Will Be Soft

* * *

**8th of the Red Wolf Moon, 6 Years ago**

* * *

“I can’t fucken believe this is happening,” Sylvain groaned, his face mushed into the gross cafeteria table. He looked like he was plucked right out of a baroque painting, his crimson hair a mess of curls that splayed over the white table top, his school uniform rumpled to look like draped silk over his body, his long forgotten lunch grew cold by the second, and the contents of his backpack were spilt over the table. 

“It’s not that bad Sylvain” Felix rolled his eyes, snagging a chicken nugget from the redhead’s plate. 

“Not that bad?! Felix I don’t have a date for the autumn festival!” 

The younger man just gave him a flat stare before biting down on the nugget. “Tragic. Truly.” 

“Oh fuck you” Sylvain huffed, falling back onto the table, “you’re just being like this because you and Annette agreed to go together like the cute couple that are.” 

“We’re not a couple” Felix huffed though the blush on his ears gave away the tough guy exterior he was trying to put on. 

“Yeah yeah whatever, I still don’t have a date!” 

“And why should I care?” 

“Because if I don’t get a date I _will_ stalk both you and Annette the entire night and take pictures that I then _will_ share with both your brother and dad.” 

Felix looked damn near mutinous at the sound of that. The younger man’s glare could cut right through steel but Sylvain’s exterior was sturdy enough to deflect it. The redhead having been on the receiving end of those glares for so many years now that it did nothing but amuse him. The two, unsurprisingly, ended up in a staring contest because Felix refused to stop glaring and Sylvain lived to make the other man miserable. And that’s how Ingrid and Dimitri find them when they come back from the lunch line, the two idiots eyes now red from the lack of blinking. 

“What’d Sylvain do?” Ingrid sighed as they both sat down. 

Sylvain put his hand up to tell the blonde to stop talking just for a couple seconds longer before Felix finally blinked. “Fuck!” 

Sylvain snickered, sitting up and turning to the blondes, “okay first of all, I didn’t do anything. And second of all, how come you never assume Fefe is the one to be in the wrong? Huh?” 

“Because when Felix fucks up, it’s usually a catastrophic event and _you_ rarely argue with him about it. Either you mope or run away, there’s no in between” Ingrid crossed her arms. 

He frowned, “I don’t mope.” 

She rolled her eyes before turning to Felix, “what’d he do?” 

Felix rubbed his eyes with the back of his hand, “he lost his date and wants me to suffer because of that.” 

“Date?” 

“You know Bethany? The girl I was going to take to the autumn festival?” Sylvain asked before sighing, “yeah well she got back with her ex and I’m shit out of luck now since the festival is _today_.” 

“Sounds like a personal problem” Ingrid mumbled before digging into her lunch. 

“Fuck you” he laughed. “The only reason you’re saying that is ‘cause you’re going with Ashe on a friend date” he huffed before falling back onto the table, hiding his face into the crook of his arms. “Can’t believe you virgins have dates but I don’t” he whined. 

“Virgins?!” Both Felix and Ingrid sputtered before Dimitri finally spoke up. 

“Uh what festival?” The blonde asked and immediately all three of them looked at him with varying emotion. Felix looked at him like he was an idiot, Ingrid looked at him with pity, and Sylvain looked at him like he was his goddess damned savior. 

“The autumn festival Dimitri, the one that happens every year” Ingrid answered hesitantly before it finally clicked for the blonde, a small ‘oh’ coming out of his mouth. 

“Wait holy shit Mitya you don't have a date?” Sylvain beamed, obviously if the blonde didn’t even know of the event it meant he hadn’t been asked to the festival or looked for anyone to go to it. 

“...No.” Dimitri answered warily. 

Sylvain chuckled, leaning to the side to swing his arm over Dimitri’s shoulders, “then you my friend, just scored yourself one. Don’t worry sweetheart, I’ll show you a world of wonders.”

“You will do no such thing” Ingrid hissed before smacking him with one of his notebooks like he was some dog trying to eat the leftovers from the counter. “No. No. No. You will not do anything to him!” 

“I wasn’t going to!” He whined as she kept smacking him. “I was just going to show him a good time!” 

“Not allowed!” 

Dimitri chuckled nervoulsy, leaning forward to grab the notebook from Ingrid's hand. “It’s fine Ingrid” he smiled at her before turning to the redhead. “As long as you don’t get us into trouble, I-I would not mind going with you.” The blonde stammered out, a deep blush slowly spread across his cheeks as he tried his hardest to maintain eye contact with the older boy. 

Sylvain grinned, “don’t worry Mitya, you won’t regret it” he winked and instantly the blonde’s face turned a deeper red. 

The autumn festival was for all accounts and purposes, not that breathtaking. Snow had already begun to fall on Fhirdiad and so any ‘outdoor’ activities that the rest of Fodland would be able to partake in, was thrown out the window in the cold city. Of course, that didn’t stop any Faerghan from going out and making the best out of a bad hand. The city streets were blocked off and salted for vendors to line their stalls in to sell foods, gifts, clothes, and everything else that they could come up with. There was music in the air and fairy lights decorated every street lamp and building. At first glance it looked like the festival was meant for it to be for winter but that was only thanks to the snow and ice around them. The rest of the decorations still kept to its autumn feel and all of the drinks and food stayed to the theme. 

That and Faerghan winter festivals were a lot more luxurious than this smaller festival. 

The plan initially had been for him to pick Dimitri up at his house like any proper guy would do when they asked someone out on a date (a friend date, his mind supplied). However, Glenn was dropping off Felix and Annette and since the Fraldarius’ now lived next to the Blaiddyd’s, Dimitri tagged along. So because of that, Sylvain now stood alone at the entrance waiting for a blonde head to appear. 

Unluckily for him, Sylvain was an overplanner when it came to dates, even the last minute ones that involved a friend instead of a fling. Which meant that Sylvain had not only arrived 15 minutes early, but had also already planned on what he wanted to do with Dimitri. Obviously they would eat, and he had brought enough money to pay for them both, and obviously they would window shop and maybe actually get themselves something (if he saw something he thought would be cute for Dimitri, he also had enough money to buy that). And hopefully, he would be able to convince the blonde into a dance or two. He wasn’t sure if Dimitri enjoyed dancing or not but he sure as hell wasn’t above begging if Dimitri didn’t. 

And because Sylvain lacked the ability to ever go out in public without making a _statement_ , he came dressed in his best. Where most people were, reasonably, wearing puffy jackets to protect from the cold, he was wearing a black trench coat, black jeans, and a red turtleneck underneath. He wasn’t cold, he had always been the one in the friend group to manage the cold the best, but he also knew if the snow picked up he would be royally fucked. He figured fashion over comfort was a worthy enough sacrifice to make though so he wouldn’t complain. 

He sighed, shifting in place before falling into temptation and pulling out his phone. He scrolled through his social media for a couple of minutes before ultimately deciding to message the blonde to figure out where he was.

_Mitya?_

_you here yet?_

**Mitya (5:32 pm):**   
_yes!_

_I was saying goodbye to Felix and Annette_

_I am heading over right now :)_

He snorted, still finding his friends' unusual polite texting to be funny especially when paired with a smiley face. He shook his head, putting his phone away before looking over the sea of people to try and locate Dimitri. Thankfully, he’d grown taller in the past year and so he wasn’t forced to climb onto something or even get on his toes to see past most people. He craned his neck up, turning to the right and immediately the smile on his face grew at the sight of Dimitri briskly walking and apologizing to people so that he could get past them. 

The blonde was wearing one of the puffy jackets, a blue one that Sylvain was sure his mother had forced him to wear. It wasn’t zipped up though and underneath was a grey knitted sweater that screamed ‘Christmas present from grandma’. It didn’t help that Dimitri was wearing khaki pants or that the boy kept styling his hair to make him look like a mixture of Prince Charming and a boy scout. In every sense Sylvain should be chuckling at the fact that his friend looked like a “major nerd” but he couldn’t bring himself to do that. Instead he felt almost smitten by how cute Dimitri looked and how somehow, it warmed his heart. (And no, he wasn’t going to think about _why_ it did, he’d learn long ago not to question that sort of thing). 

“Ah Sylvain!” Dimitri called out before running over to him and smiling, “sorry for keeping you waiting.” The blonde smiled shyly, the tip of his nose slightly red from either the cold or a small blush, Sylvain wasn’t sure, all he did know was that it was, regrettably, adorable. 

“It’s fine, I just got here anyways” he smiled at the boy before beginning to walk with the crowd. He should ask Dimitri if he wants to do anything specifically but he also hasn’t eaten since lunch at school so he figured getting food first wouldn’t be a bad first thing to do. “So did Felix and Annette look cute together?” He asked, trying to get a conversation going between them. 

“Oh Annette looked very pretty, she was wearing a long dress. Felix looked the same, though he did get flustered when Glenn told him that he should be holding Annette’s hand” Dimitri mused. 

He sighed, “of course he wouldn’t know to hold a girl's hand. It’s like everything I taught him just left his memory.” 

“I think he’s just nervous,” Dimitri added, bumping into his shoulder when a couple of kids ran into him. “Sorry” he quickly mumbled before pulling away. “B-But I think he just doesn’t know how to initiate that kind of thing. I-It is hard after all.”

Sylvain rolled his eyes before reaching over to grab Dimitri’s hand, lacing their fingers together, “just like that? It’s not very hard Mitya” he chuckled before shaking his head and looking away, completely oblivious to Dimitri’s face suddenly burning up. “I swear that boy. He’s lucky Annette finds him to be cute instead of awkward or else she would’ve dumped him.” 

“I-I don’t think they’re dating” Dimitri stammered out, pulling at his sweater to try and get the heat on his face to go away. 

“Oh they’re not but only because Felix lacks the balls to actually ask her out” Sylvain hummed before perking up at the sight of a food stall that looked appetizing enough. “You hungry?” He asked, turning to the blonde with a smile. Dimitri blinked, suddenly remembering how blinding Sylvain’s actual smiles were before nodding. “Alright I’m paying,” the redhead said before pulling the boy towards the stall. 

Luckily enough, Sylvain seemed to pick the one food stall that served an unnecessary amount of cheese related foods and he had to send a silent thank you to the goddess because just the sheer happiness that had crossed Dimitri’s face when he bit into his food, was enough to make his entire day, no, week. Though the entire time they were together, he found himself thanking the goddess more and more. 

He had honestly forgotten how much he enjoyed spending time with Dimitri, with _just_ Dimitri. He was fun to talk to and so genuine with the attention he gave you that it was like a breath of fresh air from all the usual girls he hung out with. That and Dimitri was so open to trying new things, despite his hesitance, he danced with Sylvain under the fairy lights with a smile that threatened to break Sylvain’s heart. He danced and stumbled, the man not having a sense of rhythm but just his sheer desire to try was enough to make Sylvain laugh. It was rare for him, extremely rare for him to feel comfortable enough to actually laugh in front of other people because he tended to snort in a way that made him feel self conscious but somehow in that moment, watching Dimitri stumble like a newborn deer, he couldn’t help but laugh. Snorting and wheezing as he felt like his cheeks hurt from smiling before he looked up to find Dimitri looking at him in awe as if he was looking at something absolutely breathtaking instead of, well, Sylvain. 

He smiled at the blonde, unfiltered and raw before turning away from Dimitri’s fierce gaze. It was terrifying, Sylvain realized, terrifying to be looked at as if he was worth the world when he knew that he was worth absolutely nothing. But Dimitri seemed to always do that, seemed to always get into his head and make him believe that he could be so much more when in fact he was nothing special at all. If he thought hard enough, he thinks he could figure out why Dimitri looked at him as if he had put the stars in the sky. But then again he’d never been very smart, he realizes. He’d never be able to solve that riddle even if he tried. 

“Come on Mitya” he smiled at the blonde, lacing their fingers together as he pulled him through the crowd to look at all the gifts and souvenirs. “I want to buy you something.” 

“Please Sylvain, you already paid for our food” Dimitri whined. 

He stopped in front of the biggest stall before turning to the younger boy, “come on Mitya, let me spoil you once in a while” he snickered as he ruffled the boy's hair. “You deserve it after all.” 

Dimitri blushed instantly, mumbling under his breath before Sylvain pulled away to look at the things being sold. It was a ton of miscellaneous things ranging from books to toys to perfumes. There wasn’t any rhyme or reason for the things sold in that stall except that they were all fall themed. Hundreds of pumpkin scented things, hundreds of pictures of yellow and orange leafed trees and pumpkins, and even more fall accessories littered the stall. It was as if autumn itself had puked in the shelves that lined the small tent. 

He hummed, looking over every little thing carefully and trying to make up his mind on what he should get Dimitri. It was getting late anyways, the sun had come down and he knew that soon he would have to drop the blonde off at his house. They’d spent too much time dancing and eating and now they didn’t have time to look at all the stalls but Sylvain figured he would be able to find something here and sure enough, his eyes landed on the perfect thing to get the younger man. As discreetly as he could he called the shop owner over to pay for the gift while Dimitri was distracted. 

He waited for Dimitri to finish looking, hiding the gift behind his back and humming besides the blonde until Dimitri sighed, “I don’t think there’s anything here I want to buy you” the boy mumbled with a frown. 

Sylvain chuckled, “you don’t have to get me anything Mitya” he reminded the boy as they stepped away and towards a less crowded area. 

“I feel as if I should, at least to thank you for bringing me here and spending today with me.” 

He waved the boy off, “as if I would have it any other way. But anyways!” He smiled before bowing and dramatically handing off the gift to Dimitri. It was a small lion stuffed animal. It was cute in it’s own way, far from perfect and probably completely overpriced, but the main reason for Sylvain’s purchase was simply because the lion was wearing a blue jacket that had Fhirdiad written on the back. It wasn’t fall themed and in a way, kind of a lousy present to remember the autumn festival, but it was perfect in the sense of it being a gift for Dimitri. 

Sure enough, the blonde instantly beamed at the gift as his cheeks colored in a way that Sylvain knew was not from the cold. “Y-You didn’t have to get me this at all.” 

“I didn’t,” he agreed with a shrug. 

Dimitri laughed breathlessly, bringing the toy up to his chest and smiling at the redhead, “thank you.” 

His traitorous heart skipped a beat at that, yelling at him things that Sylvain was forced to push down. “No need for that Mitya” he chuckled, scratching the back of his neck. “I just saw it and immediately thought that it was you b-because you know, you’re my little lion” he smiled. 

He doesn’t stop thinking about that nickname for the rest of their time in the festival. He doesn’t stop thinking about that nickname as he drops off Dimitri. He doesn’t stop thinking about that nickname as he laid in his bed that night, plagued with the image of how absolutely enamored Dimitri looked at being called that. 

The next day no one even questions him when Sylvain starts calling Dimitri that and so selfishly, he keeps the nickname.

* * *

**8th of the Red Wolf Moon, Present**

* * *

He doesn’t even bother knocking, he knows the front door is open, he _knows_ it’s unlocked, and so he just opens the door as loudly as he can before stepping into the house. He has a raging migraine, dropped his coffee on his way here, and his phone charger broke mid way through the night leaving his battery at 20%— you could say he wasn’t having a pretty good day. 

“It’s me” he called out as he made his way down the hall and turned to the living where sure enough, the owners of the house were there. Dedue, Ashe, and Dimitri all looked at him questiongly but were wholly unsurprised by his visit. Ever since the three decided to room together, the house became the meeting point for their friend group, so much so, that sometimes they all just showed up out of the blue (hence the unlocked front door). 

“Oh hi Sylvain” Ashe smiled at him as the redhead made his way towards them. 

He grumbled a hello before falling into the sofa, his face landing directly on Dimitri’s lap where he then nuzzled himself onto the man until he was practically curled up on him like an oversized dog. “I feel like shit” he mumbled into the blonde’s sweatshirt. 

Dimitri tensed for a split second before melting into the situation, his hand moving so that he could rub Sylvain’s back. “What happened?” 

“Migraine, dropped coffee, broke charger” he mumbled, “not even 2 pm.” 

Dimitri hummed before Dedue spoke up, “do you need medicine?” 

“No thanks” he sighed, wiggling his body so that he could turn to look at the others but then immediately froze in place as his eyes immediately locked onto brown piercing ones. Instantly he shut up from where he laid and in record breaking speed, was on the other side of the couch away from Dimitri. “Oh hi Glenn.” 

“Hey Syl” the older man eyed him warily, judging from the pajama bottoms and sweatshirt, he had either just gotten up or didn’t have the energy to change. Sylvain wouldn’t be shocked by either answer. Where Felix was a hyper goblin that rose with the sun, his older brother was a sleep demon that was awake for at most, 8 hours a day. 

He opened his mouth to reply to the man before he saw Glenn look at him and then at Dimitri and then back at him and instantly Sylvain wanted to bury himself alive. He had completely forgotten that the two had a thing going at the moment and he had most definitely just made it extremely awkward by crawling onto Dimitri’s lap. And that was if he hadn’t just ruined the blondes chances at getting with his crush. 

He mentally berated himself before getting up, “here man, sorry for taking your spot.” He laughed easily, turning to Dimitri and winking at the man, before plopping down on the bean bag chair next to Ashe. “Anyways been a long time Glenn, what? 8 months?” 

“Yeah” Glenn answered hesitantly before sitting down on the couch and Sylvain took note of the space between him and Dimitri and prayed he wasn’t the reason for that. “Like 8 months or so.” 

He whistled, “damn that’s long, huh? But hey, glad you’re here and just in time for the autumn festival too” he grinned before laying out the foundation for Dimitri (or even Glenn) to take the next step in their relationship. “And let me tell you something Glenn, the festival here in Garreg Mach is so much more romantic than the one back home. It’s prettier without the snow and ice and there’s so much to do... Best place for a date” he sighed happily before turning to Dedue. “Are you and Mercie going this year?” 

“That is what we were planning to do though it won’t be till later since she has work today” Dedue answered. 

“W-What about you Sylvain,” Ashe asked, eyes shifting slightly. 

“Me?” 

“Yeah, are you going to the autumn festival with anyone?” 

He grinned, “Ashe are you asking me on a date?” Instantly the younger boy flushed but also looked slightly panicked at what Sylvain was asking which only made the redhead laugh. “Aw you’re so cute Ashe, if you wanted to come with me all you had to do was ask” he snickered, sitting up to ruffle the boy's hair. 

“W-W-Wait that wasn’t it” Ashe stammered out, growing a darker shade of red by the second. 

“It’s fine Ashe” he grinned, “I know it’s not romantic or anything. It’ll just be a pair of friends enjoying their time together. And hey, maybe we can crash on Annette’s and Felix’s date, it’ll be pretty fun honestly” he mused as Ashe turned to the others for help, giving Dedue specifically, a very distressing look that Sylvain was completely oblivious to. 

“Oh well actually” Dedue spoke up, “Mercedes was planning on having Ashe help us with something.” 

“Boooo. No fair” he whined playfully before sighing. “Tragic. Truly tragic. And here I was already excited at the idea of spending all night with my best pal Ashe.” He sighed again before shrugging, “but anyways to answer your question Ashe, no, I am not going to the festival with anyone but only because I’m not planning on going at all. I’ve booked the studio for the afternoon since it was the only time available this week so after 4, I’ll be practicing.” 

“R-Really?” Dimitri spoke up, looking genuinely upset about him not going to the festival. 

“Yeah, at first I was super worried I wasn’t going to be able to find a day to practice for this week. And up until yesterday I hadn’t but one of the girls texted me last night to tell me that she’ll give me her day since her boyfriend wanted to spend today with her” he explained. 

Dimitri frowned, “but you love the autumn festival.” 

“Yeah I do” he sighed before smiling at the blonde. “That just means that you and Glenn will have to enjoy it for me” he winked at the blonde before getting up. “Anyways, now that you’ve reminded me, I should probably actually go eat and do a couple of things before I have to head to the studio.” He stepped forward and for a split second, went to reach out to hug Dimitri but then Glenn’s face peered from his peripheral vision and instantly he was side stepping away, disguising it as joyful hops. “Anyways buy me some pie and I’ll love you forever” he yelled out to the group before waving goodbye and walking out the front door. 

It wasn’t until he was sitting in his car that he let out a groan. He hadn’t realized just how physically affectionate he was towards Dimitri until now when he no longer could be like that with the blonde. He had gotten too used to being able to hug the man and shower him with affection and now that he was trying to get with Glenn it was coming to bite him in the ass. A small part of him (a giant part of him) clenched at the thought of Glenn and Dimitri, because in the end he had lied. He didn’t have practice or anything scheduled for today, if anything, he specifically had cleared out the day for the festival. For the past 6 years it had become tradition for him and Dimitri to go together and he would be lying if he said that he hadn’t made plans to do that this year too. But then Glenn showed up and Sylvain would rather gut himself than ever put his own happiness over his friends. Yes it was tradition, and yes Sylvain loved going to the festival with Dimitri, but he wasn’t so selfish to take this perfect date opportunity from the pair. This was the perfect time for the two to take that small leap from friends to lovers after all.

His hands clenched on the steering wheel before he pulled out and drove back to his place. The clenching feeling in his chest only grew the more he thought about it until he was left laying on his couch with his dog curled on top of him, realizing that today really was not his day and he let sleep take over him. 

He wakes up hours later to his front door opening suddenly and his dog barking and using his face as a springboard. He groans, yells at his dog to shut up and in the time that it takes for him to open his eyes and look up, he finds Felix looking down at him with a frown. A frown that Sylvain returns, “what the fuck Felix? That key was for emergencies.” 

The younger man immediately rolled his eyes at him, taking his jacket off before shoving Sylvain’s feet off the couch and plopping down. “What’s wrong?” 

“Huh?” He’s disoriented, still extremely groggy, and Whiskey has gone from barking to loudly whining to get Felix’s attention. The younger man gives it to the dog but it’s still not enough so the whining continues enough for Sylvain to realize that his migraine hasn’t gone away. He winces, falling back down to the couch, “headache.” 

Felix hums before getting up and walking over to his restroom where Sylvain can only hear the man shuffling and opening up his cabinet before coming back and plopping a pill bottle on his chest. “Need water?” 

“Please.” 

The younger man nods before heading to the kitchen and getting him that exactly. It was only once Sylvain had taken the medicine and chugged half the water that Felix continued. “What’s actually wrong?” 

“Nothing.” He answers too quickly and immediately knows he just gave himself away, but he doesn't move to amend his mistakes. Simply because he doesn’t have the energy to either double down on his lie or come clean. 

Felix frowns, eyeing him for a second before sighing, “I talked with Dorothea, she said the dance studio was closed off today for the festival.” 

Ah. Well. It’s not the first time his friends found out he was a filthy liar. He only shrugged at the accusation, once again not having the energy to do anything but shrug. 

The younger man sighed, “Syl. What’s wrong? Why are you hiding?” 

He thinks it’s stupid that Felix calls it hiding. Thinks its stupid simply because it couldn’t be anymore right and it’s stupid because he hates that the younger man knows that that is exactly what he is doing. That it didn’t even take a day for Felix to find out something was wrong, do his research, and then come and call him out on his shit. It’s a testament to their friendship and how well they know each other, it also makes him realize that no matter what he says right now, Felix won’t leave until he tells him the truth. 

He sighs, curling himself up into a ball to hide his face before mumbling, “you know how every year I go to the festival?” 

“Yeah.”

“Yeah well” he swallows, for some reason even that is hard to do. “Didn’t really have anyone to go with this year so I just, I don’t know, hid so no one found that out.” 

Felix frowned, “what the fuck do you mean you don’t have anyone to go with? You always go with Dimitri.” 

He tries not to groan, but he does anyways though at least it’s semi muffled into his arm, “no. He’s going with Glenn this year.” 

“No he’s not.” 

“He is” he huffs, turning to finally look at the man. “Trust me. He is. And if he isn’t then he’s an idiot.” 

The younger man eyed him questioningly, “why?” 

“Because he likes your brother.” 

Felix goes through all five emotions of grief in one second before he lands on frustration, frowning at Sylvain as if it’s _his_ fault that Dimitri wants to bone his brother. “No he doesn’t.” 

“He does” he sighs, “he didn’t say it explicitly but he said that Glenn came here for him. That he’s spending all of his time with him and that Glenn is quote on quote, keeping him up all night.” 

“That doesn’t make sense” Felix mumbled, turning to glare at the wall before turning back to him. “It makes zero sense that he likes Glenn.” 

He shrugged, “that’s what it looks like though, you have to admit that. But anyways, I made it easy for Dimitri to ask Glenn to go with him this year so I’m sure the two are at the festival now so you and Annette can probably go spy on them to see if they manage to take the plunge.” 

Felix frowned, worrying his bottom lip with his teeth before looking him over. “But you and Dimitri…” 

His heart stops at that and he has to quickly look away to hide the hurt he knows flashed on his face. No. NO. There’s nothing between him and Dimitri, there has never been anything between them and there never will be anything between them. It’s just that simple. It’s just two friends and nothing more. So what if some nights Sylvain can admit that he feels more for the man that he does for any friend or lover. So what if every year that the festival comes around, spending the night with Dimitri is the only thing that brings a smile to his face. So what if his heart is currently breaking into a million pieces at the knowledge that despite all the years he’s spent neglecting to call what he feels for Dimitri by a name —despite all the years denying himself the chance to _feel_ — it didn’t stop the festering wound he feels now in his chest. 

“There’s nothing at all between us,” he whispers and hates how absolutely broken he sounds even to his own ears. 

He doesn’t expect arms to slowly hug him, doesn’t expect for Felix to suddenly hold him and tell him that it’s okay. He doesn’t expect it and so it leaves him vulnerable enough for one tear to break free and then for a single sob to rip a hole through his walls. Before he knows it, he’s shaking and crying silently in the arms of his best friend. He doesn’t wail like he wants to, he doesn’t scream or yell, he shuts that desire down and instead is left to cry silently except for the occasional gasp for breath. 

Felix doesn’t say anything nor does he do anything either. He just holds him because he knows that Sylvain doesn’t cope well with others seeing him as anything close to weak. He keeps his lips sealed because he knows the minute he says one word, Sylvain’s walls will shoot right back up and the redhead will go back to pretending like everything's okay and laugh the entire night off like some sick deprecating joke. So Felix just stays still, feels his shirt get wet and feels every shuddering breath go down his best friends body. 

Sylvain doesn’t cry for long, his body transitioning from crying to numbness in a speed that he’s familiar with but hasn’t experienced in a while. He doesn’t talk, he just pulls away from the younger man and pats his lap for Whiskey to jump on. Pulling the weenie dog closer until he’s practically clinging onto the pooch, Whiskey peppering kisses all over his cheeks in a small form of both affection and comfort. 

“You should— you should probably head out or you’ll be late to your date” Sylvain finally speaks up, rubbing at his eyes before shooting Felix his best smile. It falls flat, they both know it, but at least Felix is feeling merciful. 

“I don’t think you should be alone honestly.” 

He chuckles dryly at that, “yeah well. That’s why Whiskey is here. Kind of what an emotional support dog is supposed to do after all.” 

Felix frowned, “Sylvain.” 

“Felix I’m fine, really” he shook his head before smiling. “Cried it all out. So go, have fun with Annette.” 

He’s not sure if it’s because Felix thinks he has cried it all out or because the younger man knows that when Sylvain gets like this, there’s nothing in this world that can make him budge, but eventually Felix relents. Forcing Sylvain to at least start heating up some dinner before leaving him to go join Annette. Neither talks about the elephant in the room, Sylvain figures he lucked out by having Felix be his best friend since the man was terrified of confrontation especially in the emotional sense. 

Still, Felix cares and it’s because of that that Sylvain is unsurprised to see that he gets a text from him not even 20 minutes later. 

**Fefe the cat (4:13 pm):**   
_don’t hesitate to call_

_you know Annette wouldn’t mind_

_I won’t_

_tell her I say hi though! :)_

_tell her yourself coward_

_you have her number_

_you’re no fun_

_no_

_but you don’t mind that_

_no never_

He sighs as he drops his phone to his couch. He feels like shit, probably looks like shit too. He hates crying, hates feeling vulnerable, and especially hates it when he does it in front of someone else. At least Felix hasn’t said anything and it will probably take a while before he does but even then, the younger man never pushes him too much. Still. Sylvain hates that he had that moment of weakness, especially for something as foolish as his sudden jealousy for Glenn and pain for Dimitri. He’s better than this. Has trained himself to _be better_. 

He’s not made to be loved. That’s been made painfully obvious to him ever since he was small and then he’s made sure that there could never be any hope for him to be anything but a notch on a bed post. He’s a fling, he’s a rebound, he’s a friend to hook up with, he’s a guy to experiment with. He’s many things but none are loved and he’s okay with that, has been okay with that for years. 

He’s just a complete fool for momentarily forgetting that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m sorry for making it sad at the end but I promise it’s the only angst in this fic because I can’t keep these two idiots sad, it physically pains me


	3. Romantic Surprises Hardly Ever Work

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey sorry it took a while to update! Life’s been tough but it’s fine! Dimivain kept my spirits up and so I am here with a new chapter! Next one will be the final one though it will most likely be very long so apologies in advance, maybe I’ll split it but for now. It’s the pre last one haha

* * *

**14th of the Red Wolf Moon, 4 years ago**

* * *

He’s nervous, shuffling in his seat and fidgeting with his hands. It’s the first time that he’s being allowed to visit Dimitri after the accident. Two months ago, Dimitri and his parents were in a car crash that took the lives of both of the blondes parents and left Dimitri in critical condition. He had been hundreds of miles away at the time, waking up to hundreds of texts and calls from his friends telling him to rush over to Fhirdiad. He had of course, drove up there like a bat out of hell and stayed up for 36 hours without sleep purely to become the pillar of emotional support for his friends. 

Dimitri didn’t wake up after they stabilized his condition and so the doctors were forced to give them the news that it would take a while for him to become conscious thanks to the head trauma he had suffered. It took 12 days, 12 agonizing days for Dimitri to finally wake up but even once he did, the blonde was far from okay. The man was hysterical when he came to and damn near dangerous to both himself and others. 

No one was allowed to see the blonde, not even his actual family. 

After 14 days of staying in the hospital waiting room, Sylvain was forced to go back to Garreg Mach both for his school and also because everyone begged him to go back. No one would tell him to his face, but he was only getting worse the longer he stayed in Fhirdiad. Now that everyone had gotten out of the shock of almost losing their friend, they all realized the mess that was Sylvain. Saw how absolutely gutted the man was and how unlike everyone else, he hadn’t been able to process a single thing in the past two weeks rendering him borderline broken.

Though him going back to Fhirdiad did absolutely nothing for him. If anything that semester was the closest he got to failing out of any of his classes. He didn’t eat, didn’t sleep, he was stressed and also the only one of the group that was so far away from the source of his problems. He got updates of course, mainly from Ingrid, but the updates were there nonetheless. Small grains of hope that kept him moving forward despite everything caving in on him. 

And then two months after the accident, he gets the call from Ingrid telling him that friends and family were allowed to visit. He can’t drop everything and go right there and then, stuck with finishing his midterms before being able to head out but the news is just the ray of sun that he desperately needed. The next few days after that phone call are the most torturous for him purely because he can’t go see Dimitri himself. He hears from the rest that the boy is fine but Sylvain isn’t stupid. He can tell that the others aren’t happy about Dimitri’s condition in the way that their smiles don’t reach their eyes when they video call him or in the way that they stay vague about what they talk about when they visit the blonde. That alone causes him to rush through his exams and get into his car and drive. 

He hasn’t slept a solid 8 hours in months and he knows he’s lost weight since the last time his friends have seen him. They don’t mention it though, mainly because they’re not any better than him. They also aren’t here with him today purely because he had asked to be alone, asked to do this alone. 

“Sylvain Gautier?” A nurse's voice snaps him out of his thoughts. 

“Huh—Here! Here” he stammers out, shooting out of his seat to jog over to the nurse. His nerves and anxiety force his legs to move quicker than he wants them to. 

Thankfully the nurse understands and just smiles at him, “over here” she says before leading him down the hall. Stopping by the door to brief him on Dimitri. To tell him not to move too quickly or to startle the man. To tell him what to expect and just how bad it will be. He notes all of that down in his brain as he nods at her before entering the room. 

He had expected Dimitri to be laying on the hospital bed but instead he’s sitting on a chair by the window. He’s lost weight, that’s the first thing he notices, he’s lost a lot of weight. He can see bones, specifically his cheek bones. His hair has gotten longer and there’s clear knots and mats that he’s sure the nurses have tried to detangle to no avail. The side of Dimitri’s face is covered with bandages, he’d lost an eye apparently, the bandages cover any other wounds he sustained. 

He swallows, his hands have been shaking for what feels like years and his voice comes out cracked and quiet when he finally manages to whisper one single word. “Mitya?” 

Instantly the blonde tenses, jumps slightly but doesn’t turn to look at him and so slowly, Sylvain walks into the room. Making sure to keep his footsteps heavy and loud as he walked towards the other chair in front of the blonde but before he could sit, a hand careful and hesitant touched his wrist and he freezed. Looking down to find trembling fingers slowly cling to his wrist and there’s an audible crack in his composure. He immediately falls to his knees in front of the man, carefully grabbing onto the blonde's hands. 

“Mitya” he breathed out, the blonde finally looking at him with a lone mournful blue eye and Sylvain felt his heart shatter into a million pieces. He hasn’t been able to breathe in months, his chest a constant numbed coldness that laced his very bones into submission but now, as he looks into Dimitri’s eyes, he feels like he’s burning. That the pain and affection he feels for the man is slowly sizzling his skin off. It’s an all encompassing feeling that leaves him gasping for air. 

“Mitya” he repeats again, gripping onto the blondes hand for dear life before bringing it up to his lips. He means to kiss it, for it to be chaste and small dose of affection but the minute his skin meets his, Sylvain’s lips can only tremble and he can’t bring himself to pull the hand away. Instead he just whispers Mitya again and again, like a broken mantra, never pulling his lips away from the warm skin. The skin that is alive and there pressed against his own. 

“Sylvain...” Dimitri’ voice is quieter than a whisper, a small fragile thing that is only audible to the redhead simply because of how close he is. But it's enough, it’s more than enough to get silent tears to start streaming down the redheads face. More than enough to get Sylvain to pepper the man’s hand and wrist with desperate kisses. 

“Mitya,” he sobs out before he feels Dimitri’s other hand grab at his hair, pulling him up and up until the blonde can bury his face into Sylvain’s stomach. Clinging to him with arms that wrap tightly around his waist, fingernails digging into Sylvain’s skin and tearing through his shirt as he pulls him closer and closer until Sylvain’s standing over him, curled in on the blonde. 

“Sylvain” Dimitri breathes out shakily, pulling him closer and whining at the fact that there’s no more space to be able to get rid of. That there is no way for Sylvain to be any closer to him physically. 

“I’m here, I’m here Mitya.” He’s gasping, his entire body’s trembling with a hundred different levels of emotion. “I’m here, my heart, my lion, my everything. I’m not going anywhere. I’m not. I’m not. I’m here.” It’s unfiltered raw emotion that makes him start peppering the man with kisses that leave them both shaking and gasping for air. From the top of the man’s head to the bottom of his jaw. Each kiss followed by a breathless ‘Mitya’ or any other term of endearment his mind supplies. 

“Sylvain” is all Dimitri manages to say between gasps until tears start falling down his cheeks. Sylvain kisses those too, gentle and careful in a way that rips a sob out of Dimitri’s chest until the blonde can do nothing more than break slowly in the redheads arms only for Sylvain mend the pieces together with careful kisses and breathless affection. 

Sylvain loses track of time, doesn’t know how long Dimitri cried or how long he’s been kissing the blonde's pale skin. His lips are swollen, his back aches, and he’s exhausted like he’s never been before. But still, his mind is wholly focused on the blonde before him and his attention never wavers. Slowly he coaxes the younger man from the chair to his bed, tucks him into the covers and soothes him with more kisses and honey soaked words. It doesn’t take long for sleep to take Dimitri away, doesn’t take long for Sylvain’s lungs to finally start functioning enough to let him pull away without feeling like he’s leaving a part of him behind. 

Visitation hours ended a long time ago, he knows that just by the night sky now showing through the windows. He also knows that at one point or another a nurse must have walked into the room and thought it best to not interrupt them. He doesn’t know whether that helps the aching feeling in his chest. If that lessens the blood flowing from his wounds or if that just rips newer fresher wounds. But at least, now as he gathers his things and takes one last look at Dimitri, he doesn’t think he’ll die from those wounds.

* * *

**14th of the Red Wolf Moon, Present**

* * *

He hasn’t hooked up with anyone in a while, has almost become borderline celibate purely for how much he’s shunned away from relationships. He hasn’t thought about it either, hasn’t fallen into temptation into getting with someone or even so much as flirting with someone. He thinks it has to do with him finally going to therapy and finding better coping mechanisms. Or maybe it has to do with how awkward he felt when Ingrid asked him if he was a perv because she noticed he kept dating girls that were blonde blue eyed and looked straight out of a magazine. He didn’t have the emotional capacity to explain to her that it wasn’t a weird fetish and instead his subconscious trying to cope with his feelings for his friend. He stopped bringing his dates to meet his friends after that, and now, there aren’t any dates to even speak of. 

He wants to, a small part of him wants to fall into that self harming cycle and just go to the nearest bar and let some faceless stranger have their way with him to get rid of the numbness in his chest. But the idea of being touched is enough to make bile crawl up his throat and so instead he does the next best thing. He dances. 

He’s been at the studio since 7 am and he only ever stops to drink water or change the music. His phone has been on ‘silent’ for most of the day, even Felix’s texts have been ignored. A small part of his mind tells him that maybe it’s not healthy for him to close himself off and dance for so long but he also knows that this is the best out of the options that is in his mind. At least the studio is empty, a rare day off for the troupe and so there’s no one there to see him continuously wear his body down again and again. 

Whiskey’s bark is the thing that finally makes him stop, the weenie dog had refused to let him leave the house alone like the good therapy dog that he was. Sylvain rarely ever took Whiskey out with him despite both his therapist and doctor telling him to always have the small dog with him. If he was completely honest with himself, he knew the reason he didn’t let the dog accompany him everywhere was because of his fear of looking weak. He’d already suffered through some scrutiny for having to need something like an emotional support dog, he didn’t want to also be under scrutiny by having to explain why he took a dog into a store or a restaurant. Yes Whiskey had the paperwork and even had the paperwork to _be_ a full fledged service dog, but it still felt horrible being asked why his dog was even needed and so he never took Whiskey out with him unless absolutely necessary. 

Today, apartmently, it was necessary. 

“Alright alright” he huffed, dropping to the floor to stretch. The little weenie jumped out of the small bundle of towels Sylvain had put on the floor for him, walking over to sit in front of him and whine. “I have to stretch before I stop for the day, we both know this” he mumbled to the dog before letting his forehead rest on the floor. 

Whiskey whined again before suddenly perking up, his fluffy ears twitched before he turned to the door and barked. It was the only warning he got before the door swung open and Dimitri peered inside, perking up once he saw him on the floor before stepping into the room. 

“Ah there you are” the blonde smiled that crooked smile that made Sylvain simultaneously swoon and also want to bash his head into the floor. “Dorothea told me you would be here but she didn’t specify the room” the blonde chuckled nervously. And Sylvain didn’t need that mental image, didn’t need to think about how adorable Dimitri must have looked opening up all the doors of this hallway trying to find him. 

“Shit sorry, I had my phone on silent” he said as he sat up. 

“That’s fine” Dimitri smiled, obliterating Sylvain’s heart for the second time that day. “I figured you would be practicing so I didn’t call to not disturb you or anything.” 

“Mitya you never disturb me.” 

The blonde chuckled, “even still, I didn't call so there’s nothing to apologize for.”

“Fine” he sighed before continuing his stretches. Shifting his body into a low lunge, before resting his back knee on the ground and then straightening his front leg. Slowly sinking deeper into the stretch until he straightened the back leg into a full split. “Don’t mind me, I’m just finishing up” he mumbled. 

“Y-Yeah” Dimitri croaked out before clearing his throat. “Yeah of course, take your uh take your time.” 

“Anyways Mitya it’s rare for you to come visit” he grinned up at the man. “What brings your lovely face to the studio?” 

The blonde’s face instantly burned up, a hint of pink already visible at the top of his cheeks and tip of his ears. Sylvain has to thank Dedue again for talking Dimitri into putting his hair up now because if not he would have been denied the knowledge that the man’s ears always blush the easiest. It’s one of the greatest things Dedue has done for the world, the redhead swears on that. 

“W-Well I was thinking of doing something later tonight and I— well I wanted to ask you if you cared to join me” Dimitri stammered out. 

He hums, moving to rest his back knee on the ground, then grabbing his back foot and pulling it towards his glute. Holding the stretch he answers, “I’m surprised you’re not asking Glenn.”

He winces at that, instantly curses himself for saying that. Wondering why he even said that instead of just taking the small victory of being able to hang out with the blonde. So what if the logical thing for Dimitri to do is to spend all of his time with the older man so that when Glenn heads back to Fhirdiad they manage to not regret not spending more time with each other. So what if that _is_ the logical thing to do? He’s selfish enough to know that he can’t handle another day without hanging out with the blonde and yet somehow his subconscious just fucked him over and stayed consistently a good friend. 

Dimitri frowned, moving to respond to that before clamping his mouth shut. The blonde breathed in slowly, fidgeting with his hands before his body relaxed. “No. I would prefer to spend my time with you since I enjoy being with you more.” 

In a blink of an eye Sylvain’s face was molten hot, a bright vivid red that clashed with his hair that forced him to forgo his stretches to hide his face in his hands. “Fucken hell Mitya you can’t just say those kinds of things without warning a guy” he mumbled. He could scream, he wanted to scream. He hates how honest Dimitri is at times because he never knows how to handle that kind of honesty. Had never been on the end of that kind of thing his entire life so now that he was, it’s the one way to get him immediately flustered. 

“It’s the truth” Dimitri chuckled. “You make me very happy Sylvain.” 

He sputtered which caused him to curl in until he was hiding his face on the floor. “You can’t say that” he coughed out, he knew his face was putting his hair to shame. Could feel the blush go down his neck and probably up to his chest. His traitorous heart was beating out of his chest and his brain wasn’t helping much either. Replaying what Dimitri said in his mind like the most torturous melody. 

He hears the other man walk forward until he feels a touch on his hair, a touch that causes him to look up and be pierced by a lone deep beautiful blue eye as the blonde kneeled in front of him. The man smiled at him, the same fond one that Sylvain still could never understand what he did to garner that kind of affection from someone like Dimitri. 

“Will you have dinner with me Sylvain?” 

Somehow he manages to say yes to that. Somehow he manages not to burst into flames in the time that it takes for Dimitri to give him the details and then leave. Of course the minute the blonde walks out of the room and Sylvain is sure that he’s no longer walking down the hallway, he screams. Full high pitched, bird like, scream before slamming his face into his hands and screaming again. It takes him a full 10 minutes to compose himself before getting out of the dance studio to get ready. 

He doesn’t go out to eat with Dimitri very much. Mainly because the blonde lives with two people in the culinary field that make better dishes than any chef in the entirety of Garreg Mach. But also because Sylvain, physically, cannot handle just being alone with Dimitri. He usually has to brace himself for _weeks_ before managing a single hangout with the blonde where their other friends won’t be there to cushion the blows that are Dimitri’s honest affection. And so obviously, he’s panicking the entire time he’s getting ready because heaven knows that even if this is a friend get together, he’s never been one to be able to function properly even on a good day. 

He’s forced to constantly remind himself that this is just Dimitri, his friend, his buddy, his good ol pal; but most importantly he’s forced to remind himself that this isn’t a date (despite how much he wishes that it was). Because of this, he spends way too long trying to figure out what to wear because had Felix been the one to ask him to dinner, he would go in just a random pair of sweats and whatever shirt he had decided to put on that morning. Had this been a date he would have pulled out the _nice_ jeans that make his ass look phenomenal and pair that with the maroon bottom up that Mercedes gave him two Christmas ago. But this was neither of those cases which was why he was left sitting in a pile of clothes pulling at his hair and damn near tears. 

In the end he chooses the jeans and a burnt orange turtleneck sweater Felix gave him a while back. 

He’s in his restroom, concentrating on putting on his contact lenses when suddenly he hears his front door open and three things happen instantly. Felix and Ingrid burst into his apartment arguing. Whiskey, the bastard, decides like the world’s worst guard dog, to choose then to finally jump into action. Barking and running from where he had been laying on the floor in between Sylvain’s feet. In the process he uses Sylvain’s ankles as launch pads to dash out the restroom door. It’s then that it happens, the contact lense that had been precariously sitting on his finger tip falls and time stops. The redhead can only watch as the contact free falls down to the sink and then slides down the white porcelain, giving him an imaginary middle finger, before falling down the drain never to be seen again. 

“Hey do you— oh what’s got you looking so nice” Ingrid grinned as both her and Felix walked into the restroom. 

He breathed in slowly, bracing himself on the restroom counter, before quietly speaking, “...you both owe me new contacts...” 

Felix took one look at the man, then the sink, then Whiskey and knew exactly what happened. “You dropped your contact lense down the drain again didn’t you?” 

Instantly all three of them sighed. Sylvain wished that this wasn’t a common occurrence, wished that he could say that this rarely happened. But when he’s naturally very jumpy and also refuses to get a cover for his sink drain, well… many contacts have died in his apartment restroom. 

“That was my last one,” he whispered. 

“You have your glasses, you’ll be fine” Felix rolled his eyes before walking out of the restroom. The blonde smiled at him apologetically before following the younger man. 

He sighed, walking over to his bedroom to get his glasses and then walking over to the kitchen where the other two were looking through his pantry. “I look fucken dumb with glasses on though and I have somewhere to be tonight” he whined as he, regrettably, put on the glasses. No matter how many times Dorothea told him that those specific frames were “in” or “fashionable” he could not stand them. His self esteem was usually a steady 7 but with glasses it plummeted to a 2. 

“You look fine Sylvain,” Ingrid said without even turning to look at him. 

“You’re going out tonight?” Felix asked, not even bothering to fan Sylvain’s ego despite the younger man always telling everyone that Sylvain looked better with glasses (most of the friend group thought that but no one, for some reason, cared to share that information with him). 

“Hmm? Oh well Dimitri and I are going to have dinner together” he shrugged despite his stomach clenching at the reminder that he was going to have to go to dinner with the blonde wearing his stupid glasses now. 

Felix instantly tensed, turning to look at him. Neither had talked about what had happened during the festival, neither had gotten the chance to bring it up, but Sylvain knew why Felix was frowning. Knew that the man was silently asking him if he was okay with being alone with Dimitri right now after what had just happened and he meant to smile. Meant to show that yes he was okay, but he guessed that his smile did that exact opposite of that since Felix was still frowning. 

“Oh you two are hanging out? That’s good, it's been a while since you two got together” Ingrid hummed, completely oblivious to the other two’s silent conversation. 

“Yeah” he chuckled nervously before his resolve slowly started to shatter under Felix’s frown. “But hey! I can ask if you guys can join us. It’s been so long since the four of us bonded anyways so I’m sure Dimi wouldn't mind.” 

“ _No_ ” Ingrid quickly spoke up before Felix even had the chance to blink. She winced, “Uh well, what I mean is that we couldn’t just barge in on you guys like that. It’s fine, we can just hang out another day” she waved him off. Both Felix and him shared a questioning look before the younger man frowned. 

“Well I’m free now and probably won’t be later,” Felix answered flatly. 

“I’m sure Dimitri wouldn’t want us to just barge into this” she gritted out. 

“Why? Not like this is some fucken private thing” Felix squinted at the blonde.

“Felix” she hissed quietly, giving Felix that one mom look that meant ‘shut the fuck up now before I strangle you’. 

“I’m sure the boar won’t mind” Felix, the man that had been a brat his entire childhood, replied. 

Ingrid groaned before perking up suddenly, grinning in a way that meant she had just come up with the perfect counter argument. “Well Dimitri was talking about going to this new restaurant in town. Some Adrestian place that specialized in not having meat in their dishes. That’s probably where they’re going to go eat at.” 

And just like that Felix no longer wanted to be a part of whatever Dimitri and Sylvain would be getting into. The younger man gave him a tiny not so apologetic look before both of them raided his pantry for wine before leaving just as quickly as they had arrived. Ingrid hugged him goodbye and Felix gave him his usual ‘text me if you need to get bailed’ look before leaving him to wait alone for the blonde to text him where they would meet up. He sighed, laying on his bed and just scratching Whiskey’s belly until he heard his phone buzz. 

**Little Lion ♡ (8:00 pm):**

_Sylvain?_

_ready?_

_yes, you can come over now :)_

_to your house??_

_oh! Yes, sorry_

_I was thinking of having dinner at my house, I hope you don’t mind_

_nah, never_

_I’ll be over in a bit then ♡_

He smiled at his phone for a couple more seconds before finally getting up and heading over. His nerves were still causing his hands to have a slight tremor to them but the knowledge that he would be at Dimitri’s house was helping him more than he had guessed. It was familiar territory and not only that, but if he was lucky, Ashe and Dedue would come and join them. A part of him didn’t want that, wanted to be selfish and enjoy a single dinner alone with Dimitri, but the other part of him wanted to scream at the idea of being alone with the blonde.

Moments like these he knew it was best for him to just turn on his music and sing his heart away instead of letting himself think about how nervous he was or how many things could go wrong. So he sang and he reminded himself that this was just a friendly thing, just a friendly thing and nothing more. An ever repeating mantra in his mind as he drove down the busy streets of Garreg Mach until finally arriving at Dimitri's home. 

He breathed in slowly, amping himself up slightly as he fixed his hair and sweater before getting out of the car. For a split second he wondered whether he should knock or not but figured that since this was a friend thing, as a friend, he wouldn’t knock and so he didn’t. 

“Mitya” he called out as he closed the door behind him, looking around the house. It was eerily empty and for reasons unknown, most of the lights were off. 

“In here!” 

For a split second he thinks about running away but immediately chastises himself for thinking about running from _Dimitri_. One of his closest friends that he would do everything for because he cared and trusted the man more than anything in the world. He curses at himself, berating his cowardice before walking down the low lit hallway before stepping into the kitchen. 

The scene instantly stabbed right at his chest and filled him with fondness. The blonde was carefully taking a ceramic dish out of the oven before placing it on the counter top, wearing Ashe’s pastel blue frilly apron despite the very nice button up and slacks he was wearing underneath. His hair was tied up and Sylvain could even see that Dimitri was wearing his ‘fancy’ eyepatch for the occasion. Sylvain smiled, feeling his heart flutter at the way Dimitri went around the kitchen, setting up the table and mumbling to himself the entire time in the way he often did when he was zeroed in on a specific task. 

And for a split second, Sylvain let himself imagine what it would be like if the world was different and he was more deserving of someone like Dimitri. Of what it would be like to come home after a day of practice to find Dimitri in the kitchen setting up dinner for them both. He would probably sneak up on him, wrap his arms around his waist and pepper him with kisses. Dimitri would laugh because it’s the most beautiful sound Sylvain’s ever heard and in this imaginary world, he would make sure to hear it every second of the day. Then they would talk all night about how their days would be, Dimitri would go on his tangents about how much he dreads going to law school but how he’s excited nonetheless. And he would complain about Manuela and how much his back hurts. They would waste away the night with each other until they would fall asleep in each other’s arms with stolen soft kisses and quiet words of affection. 

He never realized just how much he wanted that, just much he craved to have just some sort of domestic life with the blonde until now. It’s equal parts terrifying and painful. He won’t be able to have that, nothing he does will be able to get him that, but still he finds himself yearning for it nonetheless. He still hasn’t put a name to what he feels for Dimitri, still refuses to accept it, but even if he hasn’t, he knows he’ll never feel like this for anyone else. The smile on his face bitters at the thought but stays fond as he steps into the kitchen. He gets to relive the sneaking up to hug the blonde, but it’s not the warm embrace filled with butterfly kisses that he craves, instead it’s a side hug where his one arm is the only form of contact with the blonde. 

“Hi Mitya” he purrs as the blonde jumps slightly at the sudden touch. 

“Oh! I didn’t hear you” Dimitri chuckled, turning to return the hug and Sylvain can’t help but startle slightly at that, so unused to the younger man returning his affection. 

He chuckled, “you know when you said dinner, I wasn’t expecting you to have cooked. I would’ve come over to help you if that was the case.” 

Dimitri waved him off, pulling away to take off the apron, “no I wanted to cook for you tonight so even if I had told you, I wouldn’t have let you step into the kitchen to help. Though I must admit that I didn’t cook everything alone, Dedue helped me for most of the dishes.” 

“Oh so Dedue can help but I can’t” he asked, walking over to grab the rest of the dishes to put on the dining table. 

“Yes.” 

That made him bark out a laugh, snorting slightly, “I can’t even be mad honestly. I think Dedue is allowed in all of our kitchens no questions asked.” 

Dimitri laughed before the two settled down to eat. The food was unsurprisingly good and he knew that it was mainly due to Dedue’s involvement but Sylvain couldn’t help but wax poetics about the food and how great of a cook Dimitri was if only to get the blonde to blush and laugh at his antics. It wasn’t anything extremely fancy, if anything it was a casual dish that Sylvain could see someone making for their family at the end of a busy week which only added to his desire of having a domestic life with the blonde. It was perfect, it was warm, and it was everything he never thought he would want and yet he couldn’t help but yearn for it. 

The entire dinner time he forgets about his nerves, forgets that an hour before he had been shaking with anxiety, and is instead wholly focused on Dimitri. On the way the blonde laughed, how his blush turned crimson with certain jokes. Couldn’t stop focusing on how instead of sitting on his usual spot at the head of the table, Dimitri had chosen to sit next to him and for some reason, Sylvain couldn’t find the self control to stop touching the blonde. A slight touch on his knee, a single shoulder bump, more brazen things like grabbing his hand or leaning closer. 

It’s euphoric, a small dose of paradise that he wishes it could never end. In the back of his mind there’s a voice that reminds him that it will, that reminds him not to linger a second too long with his hands and to pull away slightly at the end of each touch. It’s hard to listen to that voice however, when Dimitri starts leaning closer too. He feels his brain turn to mush when he feels the blondes hand on his knee. Feels his heart jump when Dimitri tucks a stray hair away from his face. 

He hums, listening intently to the blondes rambling about school. Taking note of the way the younger man fidgeted in his seat the more the night progressed or more specifically, ever since he’d gotten up to serve them a drink. Something he shrugs off simply because Dimitri had always been weird when it came to drinking. 

He was paying attention, truly, he was, but he was also entirely caught up on the way the man's eye shined when he smiled or how his hair was perfectly framing his face. He was paying attention, he swore he was. His eyes never left the man's face even as he reached over the wine cup, his thoughts never wandered as he tipped the glass back noting how the man froze in place. He doesn’t notice he’s drained the entire contents of the wine until suddenly he watched Dimitri’s eye widen in panic as he swallows around what he knows for a fact isn’t wine. 

Instantly he coughs, a discreet panicked thing as he swallows again and feels whatever he just drank painfully go down and it’s only then that he notices that Dimitri is leaning over the table looking absolutely horrified at what just happened. Slowly, he closes his eyes and breathes in, remembers to stay calm and optimistic despite deep down knowing that was far from what he should be feeling. 

When he whispers his voice is strained and hesitant, “please tell me I just swallowed a weirdly shaped ice cube…” 

For his part, the blonde looks mortified as he whispers back, “....that was a ring…” 

The clock strikes midnight then and Sylvain thinks he’d be okay if the ground swallowed him whole.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Also I edited this quickly on my phone so I’m sorry if there’s any issues with grammar or pacing (´ ▽｀)

**Author's Note:**

> If you want to yell at me about Dimivain, I’m on [twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/wrathiess)


End file.
